Grahame Kent

Friendless is presented by the Saskatchewan Podcast Network. Welcome, welcome once more, my sweet babies It's me, your host, James Avramenko. And you are listening to Friendless, the only show about losing all your Facebook friends, one hour at a time. Of course by yours. I mean mine. You can get rid of your friends at your own pace. That's totally cool. Or don't. It's been a weird year I get it. We probably need all the friends we can get. This week, I have one of my closest Saskatoon friends on the show. Graham Kent. We talk about echo chambers, Aaron Mahnke voice, short put intense friendships, All Elite Wrestling along with my boo Kenny Omega, eating the rich and our favorite ps4 games. stick around to the end of the show to hear about some really fun future plans for friendlist. But that is then this is now. So for now, let's just dive right into my interview with Graham Kent, here on Friendless. I am I'm so you know i i was actually in preparation for this, for this interview, I was sort of going back over I was trying to remember things and we'll talk about some of them as we go along. But like, I was really remembering. Like the the first times we met and just the way we bonded was it felt like you know, there's you're you're lucky if you get it a couple times in your life where it's very organic. And it's there's no forcing like it We met at a if I'm remembering correctly, we met at a theater We met at a show. And then we went out drinking and just like found common interests, you know, and and, and I don't know why that feels so unique. Because it feels like that should be how you make a friend.

Oh, absolutely. That is like, being able to just like meet people and talk to them should be how you make friends. But it's really hard to make friends as an adult. Because there's so many things you have to navigate.

It's so hard and and I think especially now, you know, for good or ill I have it the jury's still out for me but like, but like the the the the the spectrum of what sort of boils down to almost like political allegiance gets really tricky. The whole idea of like navigating what people are okay with and not like, I think I think we're worse at it now because of social media, because we're so isolated and insulated from true, genuine human interaction. And so when we're met with, you know, because because we create this, this bubble around us, right, you know, they talk about the echo chamber, or whatever it might be. And, and so we're used to only hearing things that we agree with. So when we're out in public, and we meet somebody, and they say something we don't like our inclination now is is not to necessarily, like, unpack it and work through it and still be friends with them. Our inclination now is like, oh, you're now the enemy.

Yeah, absolutely.

And I don't Yeah, I guess I consider myself lucky that that hasn't happened with you. That I can think of has it happened with you?

No, no, no, never. I'm, I it's, it's different for me, I think because I was the shittiest person when I was younger. So I'm like, I have instant forgiveness for people. Because, like, if you have been kind to me and been a good friend, and then something bad happens, I go, Okay, that's just, you know, a bad day for you. But, um, because I'm so hard on myself that whenever I'm like, I can't be that hard on other people. Um, so if you've ever crossed the line, it's always been like, I'm sure we'll work this out. And I work on like, a strike system with people like after a while. I'm like, okay, you're toxic, and then we're not going to be friends anymore.

Yeah, enough's enough.

But, um, I tend to be quite forgiving with people. And then sometimes it comes to bite me, but I don't know. I think people should just be kinder to each other in general.

Well, God, wouldn't that be the fucking dream, right? Yeah. And the same thing too, with the idea of like, you know, I do. I, I'm really worried that I'm accidentally sounding like some kind of fucking ben shapiro shithead. But it's like, I do worry that we are too quick to write people off for their different opinions. And now and now again, I've caveated this before, but I will say it again, there is a big difference for me between like, you know, human rights aren't opinions, you know, like, like you can't your opinion can't dehumanize somebody at the same time to like, you can disagree on political, economic, you can disagree with, with policies. And you know, there are elements of that. And I think the problem is that we're, we're really losing the nuance of situations. And and I don't think it's necessarily just our fault. I think that we're being sort of conditioned to lose nuance, because it's far easier to control a group of very angry individuals than it is to control a network of dissent, you know?

Oh, absolutely.

Right. And I think things like Facebook are key to keeping us all like lonely and angry,

Absolutely, like, it's, it's very easy to enrage somebody. And it's really hard. Like, it's easy to lead through fear and anger than it is to to lead through love. Because people can, and like people naturally because we in, you know, North American society are quite isolated and taught, because of our puritanical values to be really distant with people, even our families. So it like, it builds this this world where we're just not willing to trust people when they are nice to us, so that we, like, hate binds us together, because you can say, well, you don't like that thing that I don't like, so we must be close now.

Yeah, that's a that's a huge thing for me right now. I'm, I'm so exhausted by what people are against. What I want to hear from everyone is what they're willing to prop up. What are you for? You know, and and that goes for everyone. And that, that becomes a problem with discussions with lots of people is this idea of like, you, it's so easy to be against things, the easiest thing in the world for a human to say is no. What I'm interested in is like, what are you for, like, what are you into? What's the thing you've got to prop up and, and celebrate and make sure is heard around the world? Right? And, because that's how we sort of, you know, that's how we, I mean, that's how we build right? So, you know, we talked about We met at some It was probably like a live five show,

I can tell you the exact show cuz I remember that. I have a really good memory for like social interactions, because I was so full of anxiety. During this love it, because it was the week that Jennica started at Persephone. And I had heard so much about you from Luke, that I was like, who is this person? Because it's like, yeah, like he works at atomic vaudeville and like, he's like, the super cool guy. And then I met Jennica and I was like, holy shit Jennica is so cool. Like, her husband must be so cool, too.

And then you met me too. You're like, Wow, what a fucking loser.

No, I was like, terrified because we went to go see naked tour sacred mountain live five. And they had designed the set design was on like a 90 degree angle. So we were sitting in the corner, but the only three seats left. You and Jennica were like looking at the stage. And I was looking at you. Because I was in that corner seat. So like, I spent the entire show being like, Don't breathe to loud, whatever you do, don't breathe. Because I was like, maybe a foot away from your face. And like, the profile of your face went up, like 30% into my vision. So I was like, I was scared. And then afterwards you're like, do you want to go have a beer? And it was like, Yeah, sure. Awesome. Um, and then after that, I spent like a week straight being like to do I add them on Facebook is it is it like, okay, like, she's, she works at like Jennica works for Persephone with me. But like with James want to be my friend? I don't know. And then I did and you guys have become very close and dear friends of mine.

Well, and that's the thing too. And you know, I'm right there with you about like, you know, I've talked about it a few times. And but this idea of like, when I'm when I'm in person with somebody, it's really easy for me to just like I like I love meeting people. I really love talking to people. It's just that for me, I love doing that in person. I'm very bad at email. I'm very bad at text message. I'm very bad at you know, I I always am constantly apologizing to people after I send emails because I inadvertently come across really harsh really, like overly direct and like very little like, it's almost like I have really bad bedside manner or something and so quite often people will read my emails and be like, Oh, he's pissed, or he's severe about whatever. And it's like, No, I just like, I just didn't want to waste your time because I'm not going to write like I talk. Because that's you'll never stop. It'll be four pages before I get to the point. And so like, like, for me, I thrive off of in person and off of conversation. So, you know, when we hung out, I was like, This is so fun. This guy's so cool. It's, uh, it was like, it was such a relief to like, meet somebody so quickly and to be like, yep, okay, this is gonna work. This is gonna be awesome, you know? Because it's terrifying, right? It's fun to move, and to come to a new place and to not know anybody except for Luke, Luke, who can like, fuck that guy. Right? Like, but like, um, but then I understand completely that like, the sort of anxiety around like, what's the like, what are what's the social etiquette around adding somebody on Facebook? Like, how soon do you do it? And it's like, Am I projecting like, and then we're gonna kiss or am I projecting? Like, now we're keeping it professional? So what got you? Um, what got you to Persephone? Like you, you you studied at the U of S?

I did yes.

So if we were going to end the story at and then James and I went for a beer and spent the night doing Aaron Mahnke voice. If that's if that's, if that's if that's the end of the story. Yeah, and where does the spooky story begin?

It's a complicated story. So um, I was cripplingly shy when I was younger. And when I went to high school, I started to come out of my shell, because I had friends that were very boisterous. And I was like, Oh, I can be boisterous too. Because I went, like I was a weird kid. And like, knowing as I do now, in my adulthood, like, I have ADHD, I have social anxiety. And as a kid, you don't know how to project those feelings, like how to explain them to people. I was just nervous all the time. And I was quiet. And I didn't do well in school because I couldn't pay attention. And then I got to high school. And my high school I we had to take acting as part of our general fine arts class. And I loved acting because our drama professor, which was Blaine Hart, who's a super cool dude, was just the kindest man. And then I was like, I really like this and how I got my start in theaters. Actually, ironically, I know that you introduced Megan already. I got into theater as a way to one upper because when we were teenagers, we hated each other. And Megan was in charge. It wasn't Joseph, Jesus Christ Superstar at at our high school, and I was like, I can do that. So I did. I auditioned for the show the next year, and I was in my first play was catch 22 which is like, quite a large jump to go from the very first show I ever did, I played a cow and to playing Captain black and catch 22. And then I'd like fell in love with it. And it was like, defined to me as a person because it was an outlet for like, my creative energy. And, and like as a kid, I always like wrote stories. And I talked to myself a lot, which is probably why I didn't have a lot of friends as a kid because I was like, Well, why is that guy standing in the corner talking because I was telling myself stories. And so I left high school, went to university, and I was like, I'm gonna pursue this. Did the first and second year acting program, it was cool. Wasn't really for me. I was really interested in history. And then after UofS, you have to audition to get into third year. And I made myself a promise that I would audition. And if I got in, I would switch from being a history major to doing theater. And I got in after my letter got lost in the mail, and everybody else was like, I got into third year and mine came like two months later. So I was a nervous wreck the whole time. But I went into the the acting program worked very hard through my UofS time and then after leaving school, I was like I have to pursue this career because I've put so much of myself into it. And I also around the time I was in universities when I started writing and producing and I met a bunch of really brilliant artists who like helped me find my voice as a creator. And that's basically how I got my start in theater is a bunch of other people like prodding me in the right direction until I am where I am today. So I'm going to ask you a really hard hiting question because here on my podcast called friend less but I'm stealing from you. I ask the hard hitting questions. I'm the the anderson cooper is he I don't know if anderson cooper is a good person. I don't

I don't know if he's hard hitting is the thing.

Let's go Lloyd Robertson. He seems hard hitting, you're Ian Hanomansing. Let's go Canadian content.

Ace.

Can you tell me about the genesis of the Bard of legend, Slippery Jim Flores?

Slippery Jim Flores! Oh my God. Well, I have to first I have to give full credit. Well, I don't have to give full credit, but I will give full credit to Jennica for the name, the, the, the, the origins of that name are murky because we were hanging out the two of us with my sister and brother in law. And through that, like sort of miasma, you know, they're both really funny, we're both really funny, and we were just riffing off of something. And somewhere it came up that like a really funny character name would be gym floors. And then and then and then somehow it became slippery gym floors. And first he was like, he was like probably going to be like a hard boiled villain. You know, like, I'll get you next time slippery Jim. Yeah. So that was sort of the the genesis of that and then and yeah, and so the true who came up with it is lost to the ages. But Jennica is gonna be so mad at me when she hears but, but then the character that I then played in d&d was more just, I'd never played before and I and I always wanted to and I actually, I really regret picking a bard because I find bards insufferable. Now that I've played a couple different characters and in a couple different settings, I realized what a mistake it was to start with a bard especially with like the way the playstyle that I like to have which is I try to be I try to be sort of like with withdrawn the way a bard needs to be, but I still like to be able to deal damage and there's just no way for a bard to do that until God knows what level Yeah, so um, so I much prefer wizards. I'm currently rolling a gnome wizard character named Burgell wobble tops. And he's just, he's just the best. That's awesome. That's that's the origin actually here, I'll give you he's got it because in gnomish, in gnomish culture, the gnomes actually have multiple names and they they have names for every situation and for every relationship. So quite often, these characters will have like 10 names and so Burgell's full name is actually Burgell Dimble Delebean Erky Reddlepopp Wobbles Rimple Tippletoes Waggletop otherwise known as wobbles,

that is amazing.

He's great, he's a good guy. Let's pivot a little bit, this is, uh, you know, to sort of, I love that sort of specificity. I'm gonna just whack the door open and to just broad, just the chunkiest big, broad strokes of a question possible. So, you know, as I say, this show very much is rooted in an exploration of, have I been a good friend? And is it possible to be, you know, to be to be a good friend. And I think at the at the very core of it, what we have to figure out is, what does friendship even mean? And what does it mean to be a friend? And so I'm always endlessly fascinated by all the endless definitions. And I'd love to know how you personally define friendship?

Well, that, that's a very, very broad question, big chunk, but what I would say is friendship is being there for somebody in good times and bad times. And like listening to them and loving them and taking care of them, but also giving them the resources that they need to grow in their own way. And sometimes, I actually, I had a friend who I met in my early 20s, and they gave me this beautiful piece of advice, and then immediately acted on it, which is sometimes your friend comes into your life for like a week, or a month or a year, and then they're gone forever. And this person was very close to me, for a very brief period of time, and I have not spoken to them in a decade. And it was just that, like, they went in a completely different direction than I did. And we had coffee once when they were back in town, and then we have not spoken since. Um, I don't even follow them on like, we're not Facebook friends, I don't follow them on Instagram, they just they, they're, they're very much like that. This was our time together, and we're done. Um, so I guess it's like, friendship is being in somebody's life for a good reason.

Wow. That's a fantastic definition. And you know, it's funny, that really, that really gets me thinking about some of the most, some of the most intense friendships I've had and intense in the best sense of the word. In the most like meaningful and impactful relationships have been very, very short and very truncated. And and sometimes I feel sad about that, you know, I, specifically there's, there's, there's, there's three guys that I that I befriended in Calgary in my time in Calgary who are all they all have their own, like they all run a little theatre collective together and, and as as we move to Calgary, they all sort of broke apart and moved away. So I didn't really get a chance to truly truly know them. But, but the time that I did spend with them, they were each individually so incredible, and then collectively, so incredible. And, and I really regret not getting a chance to have a longer, you know, in person friendship with them. And so just hearing that idea of like, yeah, of like, it, just make sure it's there for the right reason at the time. And if it's not, then it's cool. I love that. Yeah. connexus credit union is all about their members, improving their financial well being drives everything they do. And that's not something they say. That's something I say it's a promise that's delivered by over 900 employees across the scheduling their employees are members to, and they've been there. So they're committed to making your money work for you. the banking industry needs to change, and connexus is changing it for everyone. Because connexus cares. Visit connexus.ca to learn more.

Okay, so one of the defining portions of our relationship is professional wrestling. Because you and I were the tag team champions for a brief period of time in 2019. So I want to know who currently is your favorite wrestler or tag team?

Oh, man, it's so hard because I like don't watch WWE anymore. I just Oh, yeah, watch it. I haven't watched anything of it. Basically since the pandemic started. But even before then, I was only really watching the occasional pay per views. So all I'm watching now is a W and I watch it borderline religiously and like I watch I watch dynamite every week. I watch dark as much as I can. And you know, I don't miss a pay per view. And so I'm only really drawing from them. Personally speaking, I just I love Kenny Omega so much. I just love him. I just I the stuff that they're doing building his character slowly is just phenomenal. And you know, we're recording this. The episode will already be out but but the build that they're doing for him versus Jon Moxley is absolutely incredible. Same thing too with Jon Moxley. I I've never had such a turnaround in admiration for wrestlers. I think I have for Jon Moxley in that when he was Dean Ambrose in WWE, he was my bottom three wrestler and now is Jon Moxley. He's a top three and sometimes I worry that, um, you know, maybe he hasn't been on TV for a week or two. And I'm like, maybe I'm a little burnt out from him. And then he comes on and I'm like, Nope, still love him. Like, he's still so good. And so I just think that the creativity that those two guys are bringing to their character into their storytelling is just, it's just unparalleled. At least in in American wrestling. I can't speak much to Japan, because I'm not watching it a lot right now. But yeah, what they're doing is incredible. And then like tag teams, I mean, fuck, man. Again, it's just like, it's so hard to pick because there's so many doing such good work, you know, we finally got the the young bucks versus the FTR match that everybody had wanted for years. And it was so good. Like, it was such a good match. So it's really hard for me to say one and also like, that's just my like, I'm, I'm terrified of commitment. So I'm gonna just say, all of them, I like them all. Can I just bring all my action figures to school please?! So this is a really fun question. And I'm always really excited. And we've sort of we've sort of touched on it a little bit already, but I'm really interested to hear what Um, so what are your most vivid memories of our friendship?

There's so many. Our friendship is as I said before, very dear to me, because every time you and I talk or hang out, it's like a goldstar memory. There has never I've never had a bad time when I hang out with you and Jennica. Like

I do feel very lucky that regard in that like, I do feel like Like, if not every time at the very least, like almost every time we leave with some new joke, some new thing or some new, right?

And there's been a few times where like, Oh yeah, let's go grab a drink for like an hour. And then like seven hours later, we're like walking home, because we live near each other too. So we get a walk home together. And then it's just like, well, I love you guys have a good night. Yeah, like it's

Just this sort of like, just to sort of like incredible. Oh, and there's been like one conversation that sort of harkens back to something that you were talking about earlier. with people like not cancelling each other not giving up on each other so easily. Is that the night that you and I talked about the ethics of the guillotine. And I remember that conversation and being like, I really hope he doesn't hate me after this. And then like um, an being like, actually afraid that I was like, breaking this f iendship. And I was like, No, no there's no way. And then a coup e months later, you being lik , no, I, I see your point no . And I was like, Okay, good. it's some ridiculous amount of money. very, very briefly encapsulate that conversation, because I think it's a really important ethical quandary is the idea of, of like, Eat the Rich, right? Yeah, it's the idea of like, from because from a humanist perspective, it's got to be live and let that live. And then from a if we're going to survive capitalism's perspective, it's, we're going to need to eat these motherfuckers because like, every single day, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, all these pieces of absolute garbage, you know, decide not to end global hunger or whatever it might be, you know, and so, so, I think it is, I, we were also we were we had that discussion, like two years ago, at a time when I'm not s ying it's like radically diffe ent, but like, you know, for i stance, Bezos, like, didn't he like double his total lifeti e net worth in like the first ection of 2020, or some bullsh t, I think I read a thing that said, it was like, if you made 100,000 a year, at the end of years, like sixty year career, you'd have point 00 2% of his revenue or something like it's just like, it's just, it's, it's,it's revolting.

It's too much money for one person to have like, he's, he's a literal definition of a dragon. He sits on a hoard of money, and he kills people.

And then you have all these like, losers, these fucking mouth breathers who like defend him. Yeah. And who are like, Well, you know, he's not actually worth that. Those aren't liquid assets, or like, whatever fucking garbage they like to spew. And it's like, shut the fuck up. You aren't gonna get to suck Jeff Bezos' dick. Shut the fuck up. Or like, you always hear that one thing about like, I'm opposed to taxing 400,000 Plus, because one day, I might make 400,000 and it's just like, you fucking loser. And it's just, it's just never gonna happen. It's not like you just have to accept you are not a millionaire, you never will be. Yeah, you will be so much happier when you accept that.

Yeah. And like the real great thing that you could do, rather than, you know, founding a newspaper that will be around in 150 years and building your fortune off the back of other people. Maybe be remembered by your family and friends for being a good person, like taking care of those around you. Because you can't take it to the grave. You never see caskets full of money. I guess you could you know, that is I guess well, yeah, King Tut was buried with a lot of money.

I was gonna say, uh Grahame have you met the Egyptians?

Yeah, you're right. You're right.

But no, but I was I was thinking about how we are a culture that's obsessed with legacy. And like, and and i don't i don't understand why. But I think a part of it is to do with the fact that we we really romanticize people that we remember, and we and we really, we almost dehumanize them, right? Because like, for instance, in theater, right, we we hear names of even recent past, we hear about, I don't know Samuel Beckett, or we hear about Antonin Artaud, or we hear about these people whose work we study. And so we because we're studying them, you know, 80 years on, we think, oh, they must have had this lavish life and they must be so famous. And if we're not like them, and living rich and living lavish, then we must be failures. And it's like, Artaud. Didn't he like die in an insane asylum? Like, didn't they don't they all die, penniless. Like, like, the concept of legacy is such a zero sum game? It's like, it's like a false. It's like a false goal, because it inherently makes us feel bad about the work we're doing right now. And it leads us to pursuing something that in the end won't matter, right, like Shakespeare doesn't know that we're still doing his plays. The guy isn't even worm food. He's already been dead too long. You know, he doesn't get Fuck, you don't give up about anything?

Yeah, definitely. And like, I always wonder if that the obsession with a legacy is that, like, it makes your life matter. Like it means that like I was here.

It's a fear of death for sure.

Yeah. Which is, it's very interesting to me because I like I also have like, I need to create something that's important before I die.

Oh, totally.

Um, but at the end of the day, I'm like, but will it truly matter? And then I'm like, but it matters to me. So I guess it does matter. Like it matters that I'm creating art. So I'll continue to create art.

Well, and that's what it's got to come down to. Right. It's got to what it's got to come down to for you is not about I've made something important to someone else. It's I've made something that I'm proud of. Yeah. And then and then because then the other thing too, is that it's completely arbitrary. who becomes legacy like, yeah, like, because you end up having somebody like, what's his name, Harold bloom, just deciding what the Canon is and just being like, well, these are the books I like. So these are the books that matter. And it's like, like, legacy is so arbitrary. And so based on luck and aesthetic of the time, and and how people gauge art at different times in what they value. And so it's like, you can't, like it's impossible to discern what's gonna matter in 100 years.

Oh, yeah,

you can just do something that matters to you. And hopefully you speak honestly enough that it resonates but it won't like but who gives a shit? Like it doesn't? It doesn't matter, you know? Cuz you're dead. So fuck it.

What would you say are your favourite your top five video games that you've played on the PlayStation four.

Oh, man. Well, like and I have to just immediately jump to the binding of isaac because I play it still religiously to this day. I got it. You know, I got it for free. Uh, funny enough You know, it's it's I don't I don't tell this to be like a sad story. But it was the it was the free game the same month my grandma died. So I very much played it as like a bit of a coping mechanism for going through that sort of grief cycle and and ever since it's become the mainstay of PlayStation has been to go back to that game. I love it. Especially not only because I think it's a phenomenal game cycle, but it's also you can play it on mute. And so you can like I listen to music or I listen to audiobooks like I do other stuff. And I'm so it's so entrenched in my like, fingers now that I barely even registering playing like it's almost like medication for me at this point. So, so yeah, big time binding of issac if you haven't played it yet, everybody go get a copy. It's fucking incredible. Yeah. Um, and then in terms of like, other games, man, it's funny because it's like, I can't help but feel like so much of this generation sort of blended together into like, one, like, too big of a city. Where there's too much to do. And so I'm just anxious that I'm not doing something right. I really liked watchdogs 2. I'm a big fan of that one really like Spider Man. Those were great. Let's see. That's three. Um, oh, man. What am I like? I love me. I love me some Assassin's Creed So, but But again, I feel like all of them could sort of blend together. I think I think the Greek one is probably my favorite just because it's like, there's no way to finish it. Yeah, there's just there's too much to do. I really liked the Greek Assassin's Creed.

Official Title, Greek Assassin's Creed. Coming up next Assassin's Creed in England question mark? But early England not the one with Victorian England.

The other one? Yeah, the other one. Let's see what's

you got one left.

Got one left. Oh, shit. Man. Now I'm blanking on anything that I ever played right now. I'm like, I just stare at a screen and it's all a simulation of me playing a video game. Man What did I really like? I guess I guess. I guess just like Grand Theft Auto. I don't know. Oh, fuck. No, no, I know. Um God of War. That game was incredible. Right,

that's a chef's kiss and not kissing.

This is me kissing the microphone. Oh yeah, no god of war. I think that that game was incredible. Especially because um, I didn't really like God of War 3 for the ps3 I thought it was just too much it was overdone. But this was like, yeah, it was such a great. It was it felt like coming back to what was really good about the character and then also just like a brand new thing. Yeah. Love me that setting. I think it's absolutely tragic that white supremacists have appropriated Norse culture. Yeah, like because yeah, like fuck these people because it's so fascinating. And it's so endlessly, I think, I think that Pantheon is so intriguingly human. Yeah, there's so it's why I really like Greek mythology, too, because they're there. They're just like, they're just really powerful, but really petty? Yeah. I love that shit.

And extremely flawed.

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So I love those kinds of stories, you know, and so yeah, so yeah, God of War for me. So I'm wondering, what do you think in the face of everything that we are facing, Whether it's, you know, all these, you know, quarantine and and, and all this new waves and all these things? And, and people being isolated, and lonely and all these things, what do you think it's going to take to be a good friend, heading into 2021,

I would say and this is something that is something I've discovered during the pandemic, and something that I wish I had dug more deeply into before, which is care and forgiveness, is what makes you a good friend. Because right now, a lot of friendships are based around things that we can't do anymore. I for one really struggled when I had to switch from playing d&d with my friends in person around a table to playing in front of a screen. Because you lose the connection, the like, the the electricity in the air. And a lot of people's friendships are based around seeing each other at work, or like going and grabbing a beer. And we can't do those things safely anymore. Like I there was a couple times this summer where I let my guard slip a little bit. And I would like go to a place with friends. And we'd like grab a beer, and then I'd be like, this isn't safe, like I'm putting you in danger and putting me in danger and putting the server in danger. Just so that I can have this connection. And so I guess it's forgiving people for putting down boundaries and forgiving people for losing touch. Because I've also, there's some people who are really dear to me that I haven't talked to a lot. And I know that for them. They just needed the space, they needed to be alone or not have to interact with the world because it's terrifying. The world is fucking terrifying. I think a lot of the veneer of living in Canada and being like, everything's great, has really been ripped off this year. Yeah, like and the underlying issues that go back hundreds of years are at the forefront for people now. And it's good that we're uncomfortable. But I think a lot of people are suffering right now. And the pandemic is making it worse. So forgiveness is really important because the world doesn't care. And I think we need to care for each other. there's a there's a quote from a game called A Night in the Woods. And one of the characters says something that I just I feel is really beautiful. And it's, I believe in a universe that doesn't care and people who do because the universe doesn't give a shit about you. But the people around you can and I guess being a good friend in the in 2020 and 2021 is just giving people the space to exist and being there when they need you.

Oh, Grammy, Ah, man. I love you, man. I just like I'm just I'm so I'm so grateful for you and just, you know, yeah, I you just mean the world to me. And so I just, it sucks that we're at the point where I have to I have to do the mean part of the show, but I just thank you for that. That's that that means that I really love that answer. And I really love that thought and I'm really gonna, you know, I try to bring that forward but I'm it's a really nice reminder to to refocus on that. So, you know, I I say it all the time, but I genuinely feel this here. Like I feel like we I mean, we know this, we could talk all afternoon. I could, I could just hit record we could go for hours and hours but but unfortunately we have hit the time of the show where I have to pull up your Facebook page. So here we go. One last thing to do.

Enjoy that beautiful profile picture. I have a player. It's the last time you're ever gonna see it.

I love that drawing so much I like that's Maureen marine. I just Her art is just absolutely incredible. We

he's a fucking genius.

She's the fucking best we actually, I mean, we we have commissioned a piece from her and she showed us a very close to finished version and it just it, it. I don't even have the words like it's just mind boggling

I it's more beautiful in person.

is it Oh, I can't wait.

The camera flattens it and you don't get to see like the rich layers of color she's put in it. She's like, I don't understand how her mind works. And that's just because we're two different types of artists where she's like, she's able to work so methodically at creating an image. And when it comes to art, I have, like slabs of meat for hands. So I couldn't draw something to save my life. So the stuff that she puts up is just like, brilliant.

Unreal, unreal stuff. I will have to have her on the show sometime. I think I have her on Facebook. I'm pretty sure I do. Yeah, but but that's that's a different problem. Now. Graham Kent. We are no longer Facebook friends.

Now. I only have 659 friends.

Good lord. That's too many friends Grahame.

I know. But I was thinking the other day because one of the pre questions is how many friends you have, like 660 I need six more friends to get to the devil number

Now you need seven. or you need ten.

Oh, no.

Then you got nice. That's it. Thank you once more to Graham for coming on the show. He's just the frickin best. One thing that I had to cut out of this episode, but I wanted to mention here was, be sure to check out the podcast that he and I actually work on together along with a huge cast of Saskatchewan actors. It's called Dr. frightful presents. The links are in the show notes. It's super fun. It's like a horror comedy send up. I can only speak from my experience but I have an absolute blast, you know writing some episodes and acting in them. So be sure to check that out. It's a ton of ton of fun. If you like to show let your friends know. Share the links like the posts, review the shows, please. Everything helps. I am working on building a deeper outreach program for friendless going into 2021 but I can't do it without you. Help me Obi-Wan audience member. You're my only friend. God that's a bad joke. One way that you can support the show is buying my ebook butthead on sale now at the shop. Just $10 half of all the proceeds are going towards the Saskatoon Food Bank. The other half is going towards development to friendless. You can always skip the buying of the book and just make a donation to the food bank. wherever you live. I'm sure they could use the help. Check out friendlesspod.com/shop for details. You can find me on all all social medias at friendlesspod. I'm even on tik tok now, not really posting anything, but I do have an account. So I think that's something. Anyway, that's it for me. Next week back by popular demand, I am presenting a very, very special episode of friendlies with special guest, the wife. That's right Jennica My sweet wife is coming back for some special holiday cheer. You won't want to miss that it's going to be a blast. But as always, that is then and this is now. So for now. I want you to be kind to yourself this week and gentle with the world. And I'll catch you next time. Fun and safety y'all