Welcome to Friendless!
Friendless
Friendless
Are you paying attention? James Avramenko (writer, poet, teacher) is trying to.Friendless is a podcast about paying attention — to yourself, to the people around you, and to the ideas and conversations that help you make sense of being a person. Some weeks that looks like a practical skills episode on emotional regulation, how to actually listen, or the slow work of knowing yourself better. Some weeks it's an honest conversation with a guest, recorded live at an indie bookstore in Vancouver.An engaging and honest look at connection, intimacy, and self-compassion — minus the wellness-industry bullshit.Fun and safety, Sweet Peas!
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Friendless

Friendless

Are you paying attention? James Avramenko (writer, poet, teacher) is trying to.
Friendless is a podcast about paying attention — to yourself, to the people around you, and to the ideas and conversations that help you make sense of being a person. Some weeks that looks like a practical skills episode on emotional regulation, how to actually listen, or the slow work of knowing yourself better. Some weeks it's an honest conversation with a guest, recorded live at an indie bookstore in Vancouver.
An engaging and honest look at connection, intimacy, and self-compassion — minus the wellness-industry bullshit.
Fun and safety, Sweet Peas!

Recent Episodes

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on belonging, grief, and identity (with special guest Eddy Boudel Tan) Live at the Book Warehouse
May 12, 2026

on belonging, grief, and identity (with special guest Eddy Boudel Tan) Live at the Book Warehouse

What happens when you've spent your whole life fitting a mold — and you finally decide you've had enough? This week, James sits down with Eddy Boudel Tan, Vancouver-born author of The Tiger and the Cosmonaut , recorded live a...
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so you're no longer mentally ill...(DBT mini-season finale!)
April 28, 2026

so you're no longer mentally ill...(DBT mini-season finale!)

In this final episode of the DBT micro-season, James walks back through the terrain — mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness — not to reteach, but to reflect. What landed. What di...
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Celebrating Independent Bookstore Day (with special guests Cathy Jesson & MLA Christine Boyle)
April 24, 2026

Celebrating Independent Bookstore Day (with special guests Cathy Jesson & MLA Christine Boyle)

It's Independent Bookstore Day, and to celebrate, Friendless is doing a double feature — two short conversations recorded at the Bookshelf, both circling the same question: what do bookstores actually do for us that nothing e...
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balancing boundaries: the GIVE and FAST approach (DBT mini-season part 8)
April 21, 2026

balancing boundaries: the GIVE and FAST approach (DBT mini-season part 8)

There's a version of kindness that isn't actually kindness. It's saying yes when you mean no, showing up depleted and resentful, and building relationships on a quiet lie — the lie that you're fine, that it's all okay, that y...
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Stop Hinting, Start Asking: The Dear Man Skill for Assertive Communication (DBT mini-season part 7)
April 14, 2026

Stop Hinting, Start Asking: The Dear Man Skill for Assertive Communication (DBT mini-season part 7)

Most of us were never taught how to ask for what we need — we were taught how to be nice, how to be agreeable, and how to silently hope the other person would just figure it out. And when they didn't, we either resented them ...
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A False Sense of Safety: Iona Whishaw on Trust, Community, and the Lies We Tell Ourselves (Live at the Book Warehouse)
April 7, 2026

A False Sense of Safety: Iona Whishaw on Trust, Community, and the Lies We Tell Ourselves (Live at the Book Warehouse)

What does it take to truly belong somewhere — and what happens when you didn't know that's what you needed? This week on Friendless, James sits down with Iona Whishaw — bestselling author of the Lane Winslow Mystery series — ...
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when your emotions are lying to you (and what to do instead) DBT mini-season pt.6
March 31, 2026

when your emotions are lying to you (and what to do instead) DBT mini-season pt.6

Your feelings are real. But what if acting on them is making things worse? In this episode of Friendless, host James Avramenko continues the DBT series with three tools for navigating emotions without being controlled by them. We cover Opposite Action — the skill for when your emotion is justified,…
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What Is Forgivable? A Conversation With Robyn Harding (Live from the Book Warehouse)
March 24, 2026

What Is Forgivable? A Conversation With Robyn Harding (Live from the Book Warehouse)

This week on a very special episode of Friendless recorded live at the Book Warehouse on Main Street, host James Avramenko interviews thriller author Robin Harding about her novel Strangers in the Villa. They discuss the insp...
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Naming What You Actually Feel (or 'Fine' Doesn't Cut It) (DBT mini-season part 5)
March 17, 2026

Naming What You Actually Feel (or 'Fine' Doesn't Cut It) (DBT mini-season part 5)

This week on a very special episode of Friendless, we ask what if the goal of emotional maturity isn't to stop feeling things but to stop fighting them? In Part 5 of Friendless's deep dive into DBT emotional regulation, James...
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Radical Acceptance Bro! (Distress Tolerance pt. 2)
March 10, 2026

Radical Acceptance Bro! (Distress Tolerance pt. 2)

Distress Tolerance Pt. 2: Self-Soothing & Radical Acceptance This week on a very special episode of Friendless, we're continuing our exploration of Distress Tolerance skills as the DBT mini-season hits the halfway mark! STOP and TIPP — last week's skills — are built for acute crisis moments. This e…
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Recent Blog Posts

Have you been a good friend?
May 31, 2023

Have you been a good friend?

What makes a good friend?This has been the core question of my ongoing podcast (read: freelance sociology project) “Friendless”. Lately, however, I’ve been re-examining the philosophy behind this question.There are themes that …

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About the Host

James Avramenko

James Avramenko is the creator and host of Friendless. He is a multi-disciplinary artist, working in publishing, theatre, visual, and audio mediums. His work has been published in Geist, SledgeHammer Lit, and Monster Monthly. He dreams of someday writing movie novelizations.